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thirteen.
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twelfth.
starting the year with suicidal thoughts. i thought i was over this shit. music can only saves me for so long.
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eleventh.
if i were to just disappear, would anyone even care?
i saw this post once where is says that reblog it when you need someone to talk to. i need someone to talk to.. but the problem is i don’t talk.. i write some of it down instead. i tried to talk about it but i still just can’t open up, even if you’re my bestfriend since i was 6, i won’t talk to you about this stuff. i was raised bottling most of my feelings inside and just smiling it out everyday. even at night, when people like me would cry just to let some of it out, i didn’t. i would watch late night tv instead and just let my mind wander and let my eyes tire out and fall asleep.
i’ve been like this for around 8 years now.
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tenth.
when you have no idea what to do with your life and you just sit by the computer and tumblr.
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ninth.
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eighth.
second year of not celebrating christmas cause i’m in a foreign country and don’t have anybody.
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seventh.
Just did my first job interview for the day. It lasted 9 mins. Yeah, I timed it. Hahaha. At least now my heart stopped pounding. I think I did good. Only time will tell. -_-
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Band Of Horses || No One’s Gonna Love You
It’s looking like a limb torn off
Or altogether just taken apart
We’re reeling through an endless fall
We are the ever-living ghost of what once was
But no one is ever gonna love you more than I do
No one’s gonna love you more than I do
And anything to make you smile
It is my better side of you to admire
But they should never take so long
Just to be over then back to another one
But no one is ever gonna love you more than I do
No one’s gonna love you more than I do
But someone,
They could have warned you
When things start splitting at the seams and now
The whole thing’s tumbling down
Things start splitting at the seams and now
If things start splitting at the seams and now,
It’s tumbling down
Hard.
Anything to make you smile
You are the ever-living ghost of what once was
I never want to hear you say
That you’d be better off
Or you liked it that way
But no one is ever gonna love you more than I do
No one’s gonna love you more than I do
But someone
They should have warned you
When things start splitting at the seams and now
The whole thing’s tumbling down
Things start splitting at the seams and now
If things start splitting at the seams and now,
It’s tumbling down
Hardthis song just started playing in my mind. does that ever happen to you? that out of nowhere a song just pops up up there and makes you remembers something that may or may not be related to the song…
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sixth.
it is stupid to have expectations.
people don’t live for your expectations.
events won’t happen based on your expectations.
love won’t arrive and come about because of expectations.
life just won’t fall all accordingly to your expectations.if you want to expect, expect failure. so when you succeed, its twice as worth it.
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fifth.
Today, i feel like such a lucky bastard. Thank you ticket contest gods.
Just won two contest for the same event. I now have 4 tickets to see my favorite band. And I gave 3 of them away to people. I feel like Santa giving the gift of Andrew today. Hahaha.
